Anger is a feeling. This is a normal response to threat, hurt, pain, attack and disappointments. The anger is meant to convey in acceptable manner than crushing all that comes in your way. When you throw anger on others, it’s not in your hands anymore. Tame your feelings to make others your slave.
1.Why dealing with anger?
There is a strong belief that managing anger means suppressing. This is just a myth; the actual goal of anger management is controlling on self in a healthy way for others and us. The key is to not to loose control. All of our needs will be met upon strengthening self in exhibiting anger during dealing with relationships. Anger management saves us from a bundle of health issues. Our physical and mental ailments resist from worsening and stop developing at first when we aim to manage our anger. Another benefit that we see is in long-term healthy maintenance of relationships, academic and professional successes.
2.Identifying the sources
Sometimes there are genetic reasons behind being a hotheaded person who intensely and easily becomes annoyed. Others have psychological vulnerabilities, becoming physically ill, getting touchy, irritable, depressive, and anxious and feeling regretful afterwards.
For example, someone being sensitive enough to think that they are the one whom should be blamed after a minor mistake that’s unintentional
The problem is in not recognizing how to deal with it, having solutions and constructive brainstorming. Then come the social factors, values, cultural demands and pressure that are given by environmental commitments. However, always those who show tantrums are not only angry, sometimes those who withdraw are also experience anger at peaks.
3.Knowing the behaviors
What someone does in anger is another way to effectively plan about anger management. For one, it is crucial to see in what ways the person damages self. They can be physical expressions, verbal gestures, non-verbal avoidance techniques or something else. Every time you feel angry maybe you are able to notice that your face is red, muscles are tightened or the tears rolling down your cheeks. There are countless signs and symptoms that you are able to see when you pay attention. Individual differences are always there.
4.Consequences of bad temper
The outcome is harm to mankind and harm to someone’s soul, heart and personality. The inability to control one’s anger is our problem and not those who have felt hurt as a result of our temper, violence, throwing off curse and abuses. The anger expression is uncomfortable for all those who directly or indirectly confront this feeling. A hurting approach is never appreciated and not enough to resolve any issues. In order to let others listen, first try to be calm, quiet, open and honest about what makes you uncomfortable. Small arguments lead to long-term grudges when you continue to stay angry about one-time conflict.
5.How to deal with anger?
If you are suffering from anger that is ruining your peace and relationships then you are seriously in need of seeking help for assertive training through an expert in the field. Remember that no one has the right to throw up anger on others as well as no one must bottle up anger within himself or herself to damage own health and happiness. This is one of the best ways to seek help and socialize, group counseling and individual counseling are both very effective for anger management. The purpose here is to connect angry person with their feelings and thoughts.
The roots of an angry person are in their childhood. If you look back on the patterns of treatment you most likely to face as a child, you feel like you are simply doing the same with others right now. Anger is a mask, a mask for other negatives feelings that we are afraid to show; they can be our pain, shame, insecurity, guilt and frustration. Not only this, sometimes a mentally ill person is not aware that the feelings are the sign of depression, anxiety, mood swings and other disorders that is not diagnosed yet. In both the cases, it is not your fault but needs your attention.
Try compromising with the weaknesses, disapprovals, and perspectives of others that does not fit in your mental schema. Life is a continuous struggle; we learn, unlearn and change as a result of many things in life that we do not like. Inability to compromise with others scares us, makes us restless and we cannot leave our rules and values for someone.
Personally challenge self for this feeling, try not to respond once a day on other’s behavior that is not suitable for you. Covering up feelings and telling others that you do not feel bad is another form of self-harm and unhelpful. Just explain as it is.
There are number of physical reactions that body tells you when you are feeling angry and out of control for a long time. There may be muscle ache, headache, mental stress, hearts pounding, sweating, shivering, getting hot, red and vulnerable to burnout even at minor things.
This is not always visible and not always announced in the form of shouting and yelling, hitting things, breaking rules, wearing off items that are valuable. It requires a wise mind to analyze what is bothering us and how we need to kick off all this to make lives better.
In conclusion, the expression of anger is not wrong; showing it inappropriately is the problem. This powerful emotion damages our own lives than others. Always talking to someone in anger may not remove the disagreements. Careful consideration and planning is required to prevent further damage. It is easy to feel angry but a lot of work is needed.